Poem for an Anxious Sunday Afternoon
I Just Want it to be Over Today
I Just Want it to be Over Today
Sit here. Surrounded by laughter and life in this house full.
Ringing tension. It grows louder with every minute that passes.
Dirty floors. Can’t get up to clean them.
Dirty dishes. Can’t stand to wash them.
Argument with wife. Light seems to fade into blackness.
Teenager failing classes. More yelling and forcing homework duties.
Kid wants to play. I can barely see the screen or know how to comprehend the rules.
No food today. My stomach growls at 1 pm but I don’t feel like eating.
Why? The question I can’t answer.
What? The question I can answer. Anxiety
I can’t possibly understand everyday of my life, yet,
I have to think about every action that causes a reaction that causes a reaction.
Hours keep passing by and I don’t know what to do with my self today.
I worked hard this morning and now I can barely talk.
Meds. I took them at 9 am.
Fake smile. My son sits next to me and has no idea.
Toes and fingers. I don’t want to move, but can’t hold still.
A rush of blood to the head. Without the British rock band.
Sleepy. I feel guilty for being tired and unable to do anything else.
Waving trees. Nature must be pretty happy with itself today.
Sizzling food on stove. Been 20 minutes since the fight and I’m still miserable.
Daughter come down stairs. If I had been failing 4 classes I would have just failed. My parents wouldn’t have come to the rescue.
I just don’t want to do anything this today.
Yesterday was fine. Today is not.
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