Patrick’s Howlling Again
A Poem Inspired by Allen Ginsberg
Poetry and Prose
A Poem Inspired by Allen Ginsberg
Allen Ginsberg published “Howl” in 1956 . It is, amoung other things, a scathing rebuke of industrialized civiliation. Regarded as a crowning achievement in poetry by scholars and educators, my professor tasked me with creating my own “howl-like” poem during my senior year at the Univeristy of North Texas. The following poem, Tough, is my own rebuke of the life I lived at age 24, and the wrongs I saw in the world around me. I performed it live only once and after 12 years of performaning on stage with music, acting, and speaking , it was last performance to date.
Who listens to music that mommy and daddy can’t understand and won’t listen to so that they call him a loner, freak, psychologically stunned and put him on meds until his world is nothing but a dream!
Whose girlfriend has been raped and sexually assaulted by the ones she called boyfriend, father, and friend, and stares out into nothingness until the entire world falls around her in a crumbling, never-ending sea of shit!
Whose mother was cheated on by her own husband over 12 times in 30 years only to take him constantly back over and over because of her 3 young boys who she couldn’t stand to watch grow up without some kind of father figure!
Who is never tall enough to play sports, never strong enough to help move, never smart enough to make A’s, never cute enough to get the girl he deserved only to be laughed at by children as he walks down the street every day of his entire life!
Who had rumors spread around the community about him because he wanted to have sex, but Noooo the stupid, prejudice, backwards “christians” from that loser Denton Bible Church had the audacity to call him “womanizer, a love’em and leave’em man” until she finally broke up with him under the pressure of hypocrites!
Who has been shunned and turned away by church after church who claims to be accepting only to mock and destroy those who don’t go to the right school, have the right clothes, listen to the right music and then watch those ass holes go get high as a kite until they can’t remember the difference between fucking Jesus Christ and their own God damn hands!
Who was kicked out of a praise and worship band that he helped start just because he didn’t fit in with the rest of the preppy fucking losers!
Who can’t stand to watch people walk around with those Letters on every part of their clothing who don’t understand that they are buying friends and how BACKWARDS that is when the people they are paying to be around mock his friends for not wearing polo’s when he goes out or wearing black during a hot day or dyeing his hair a different color than brown, blonde, natural red and they walk into his one safe haven, take three steps in and say, “We can’t be in here” turn around and walk out that’s Fucking right you rich fuckers he doesn’t want you in there, and neither does anyone else you cheap prejudice bastards!
Who wishes every day of his entire life that it was ALL A BIG DREAM and that at any moment he would wake up and laugh about this shitty thing he called life and be back in a big house with a lot of money and no problems or reasons or issues or enemies!
This poem, and more, can be found in my book “In Progress” on Amazon.
In Progress (The Life of Patrick Stewart Book 1)
Amazon.com: In Progress (The Life of Patrick Stewart Book 1) eBook : Stewart, Patrick: Kindle Storea.co